the power to decide life and death; absolute control over someone's fate (idiomatic, literary).
独裁者は国民の生殺与奪を握っていた。
The dictator held the power of life and death over the citizens.
その小説では家長が家族の生殺与奪をほしいままにする場面が描かれている。
In that novel, there are scenes where the head of the family arbitrarily controls the life-and-death fate of his relatives.